Sunday, December 6, 2009

Why I Hate Al Gore

I have a Toshiba Laptop… that’s not why I hate Al Gore.

I have a piece of crap Toshiba Laptop that ever since I’ve gotten it has been slow, unwieldy, and takes forever to connect to the Internet… that’s not why I hate Al Gore.

Currently the laptop, which is not the reason I hate Al Gore, but connected to the reason (or not connected to, as you’ll find out soon) refuses to connect to the Internet. The problem, Windows Vista tells me (it may be lying, Windows Vista could very well be the problem), is that my Atheros AR5700EG Wireless Network Adaptor needs to have its drivers updated.

There’s a delicate irony here… my wireless network adaptor needs to connect to the Internet to update the drivers; but it can’t connect to the Internet because its drivers aren’t working. Ahh, isn’t life delicious? And its still not why I hate Al Gore.

After a youth of watching MacGyver (never, ever watch it on reruns – you will be appalled at the amount of electric Guitar on that show) I learned one thing – learn to think outside the canister. MacGyver is not why I hate Al Gore (it is however one of the reasons I like Richard Dean Anderson – and for some quality work on the Stargate franchise of shows).

Using my ingenuity (and my desktop), I hopped upon my trusty steed, called Internet, and sought for the drivers which would fix this problem. It should take, oh lets say about 5 minutes, to resolve this issue. And now we come to it – the crux of the matter. The reason I hate Al Gore.

In an interview, in 1999 on CNN’s Wolf Blitzer program, Al Gore said the following: “During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet.”

So therefore, Al Gore, it is your fault. A simple 5 minute excursion onto the Internet turned into a half hour of pointless surfing, hunting, questing and ended in a depressing result typical of that found only in a Dickens novel. That’s your fault Al Gore.

The Internet, which probably started out as a way to pass information from one place to the next is now a tool for misinformation. In the pre-Internet world people with idiotic opinions could only affect people within hearing range… or out in TV land. Now any idiot who took typing tutor and has a friend with an account can put his opinions all over the Interweb and find followers (I know, I did!).

I never did find the drivers.  Stupid Internet.

So thanks a lot Al Gore. Thanks… a …. lot <—Sarcasm!

PS I did however meet my wife on the Internet, so it isn’t totally bad… good job on that part Al.

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